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The Emotions of Divorce

Updated: May 11, 2020

by: Leanna J.T. Simpson, Family Lawyer

Justice Abella is bang on right about our outdated civil justice system, but one thing that never changes in family law is the emotion process of separation. People need time to process their separation, to come to terms with the loss of their spouse, to accept that their children’s bedtime routines will never be the same, and that, in almost all cases, they will have less money to live on. And, at least initially, very often one spouse wants to fight, to argue, to disagree and obstruct the process. We must find a way to force delay of court applications in cases without abuse so that people can adjust to their new circumstances before spending their children’s education fund bickering about dish towels. Unfortunately, mediation and arbitration have not garnered the attention they deserve, nor the funding necessary to make them more appealing than litigation. The reality is that emotions play an understated role in how our family law cases are and can be resolved, and emotions deserve to be heard in any changes to the family law system, because so often it is emotion which drives the bus.

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